Have you ever said yes when you really wanted to scream no? Is that an addiction?
Do you often feel guilty for putting yourself first?
Do you constantly worry about how others perceive you — even strangers?
You might be suffering from “The Disease to Please.”
In a recent episode of Mirror Talk: Soulful Conversations, host Tobi Ojekunle unpacks this silent, yet emotionally draining condition that so many of us carry without even knowing it. Through the story of the beloved comedian Robin Williams, Tobi illustrates how even the brightest lights can dim when our lives revolve around keeping others happy — at all costs.
💡 What is the Disease to Please?
The disease to please is an internalised compulsion to seek validation and approval from others, often at the expense of our mental, emotional, and spiritual health. It manifests in behaviors like:
- Saying “yes” out of guilt or fear
- Avoiding conflict and confrontation
- Constantly apologizing or explaining yourself
- Feeling anxious or ashamed when asserting boundaries
This behavior is often rooted in childhood wounds, cultural conditioning, or traumatic experiences that taught us love is earned, not given.
🛠️ How to Heal From It – Step-by-Step
- Awareness is Key
Journal your reactions. Track when you say “yes” but feel “no.” - Practice the Sacred ‘No’
Start with small boundary-setting phrases. Practice them daily. - Define Your Inner Compass
Align decisions with your personal values, not social pressure. - Tolerate Discomfort
Know that disappointing others is not the same as failing them. - Daily Self-Work
Meditate, reflect, and surround yourself with people who honor your truth.
📖 Bible Reflection: Galatians 1:10
“If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.”
We are not called to perform for the world. We are called to walk in truth.
✨ Reflection Prompt:
Where in my life am I trading truth for approval?
Sit with this question. Let it guide your next act of courage.
🙏 Final Words & Prayer
In the podcast, Tobi also shares a beautiful closing prayer to release guilt and reclaim personal power.
If you’re ready to stop performing and start living — this episode is for you.
🎧 Listen to the full podcast now on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you tune in.
Your transformation begins the moment you decide to look within.
Let this book walk with you.
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